In Honor of my Nephew, Andrew

STOP!  You can't read this unless you promise not to tell Andrew about this post.  It'll embarass him, and I don't want to do that during his special week.

I am excited!  My nephew, my parents' first grandchild, is graduating from high school this weekend.  I just can't believe that the baby boy who 'initiated me' properly on his second day of life is moving on to college.  Andrew was the apple of my parents' eyes, he is ALL they would talk about.  Until Emily came along.  Then their every conversation revolved around 'him' and 'her'.  They didn't even use their names.  As if every people group in the whole world was putting its entire thought life into 'what can we do for these babies?' like Granny and Pawpaw were doing.  Like I was supposed to automatically know who they were talking about!  In a store up in Estes Park, looking at toys;  "Frank, what do you think about this drum for him, and maybe this little doll for her?".  It really used to make me mad.  After all, they never talked about my husband's and my dogs like that.  To make matters even more traumatic, they put Andrew's crib in MY room, the one with the red carpet where I grew up!  And I can tell you I let them know right quick how I felt about that.  But it didn't matter.  It was for 'him'.  Then for 'her'.  (And besides I was already married and gone.)

Since Cindy's and my parents have both gone to that Great RV Park in the sky now (I hope they're parked next to Elvis!), Evie and I will be helping to represent the Parhams.  Cindy's and my step-mother will be there if at all possible, but she has a whole nother list of grandkids on her side who are graduating and getting married.  None the less, it makes me feel warm all over knowing that she will try her best.  Even if she doesn't make it, I am already grateful for her effort.

Anytime I reminisce about Mama and Daddy, my thoughts turn to travel.  In the realm of Andrew and Emily, they loved to take Andrew camping.  Mama died when Emily was just a little over 2 years old.  I don't recall whether they ever took her camping without my sister or not.  But I can remember the stories about taking Andrew.  Mama would tell me "He had the best time, just walking around, picking up rocks!", as if he had discovered both nuclear fusion AND fission in one weekend.  And, to that, I was supposed to jump around and act crazy because he performed such a marvelous feat.  Imagine the nerve they had - expecting me to be involved in their excitement!  That little interloper took my place!  I was the baby of the family!  Not 'HIM'!  Many a conversation started with "Guess what 'he' did???", and I would do my duty and ask what tremendous discovery he had come up with now.  Which ever ridiculously frenzied grandparent that was talking didn't seem to notice my complete and utter apathy.  They lived for those towheaded little kids.

And talked at length about how they were going to take them to Disney World, take them on an airplane somewhere just for dinner (Daddy worked for Delta and that was a possibility), Mama talked about doing an Alaskan cruise.  They had such plans to show their grandchildren everything they could.  You know from reading previous posts here that my sister and I saw more of the United States than some kids our age knew existed. And Granny and Pawpaw were moving on to the next generation.  They were going to create those memories for Andrew and Emily.

But life stepped in.  Mama was diagnosed a second time with melanoma, and in a few short months, it was all over.  Things were pretty tough for a while, as we each worked through our grief in various ways. But one thing never changed:  Pawpaw's love for his grandkids.  They were the reason he dragged himself out of a destructive fog and back into life.  He missed being their Pawpaw, the obvious center of Emily's universe and Andrew's best buddy.

I do believe that if it weren't for Andrew and Emily, we might not have seen 'our' Daddy again.  I'm not sure I've ever thought about it until now, but I think they were THE reason he came back to us. We had about 12 years with him before his lungs gave out. So I guess I ought to thank that interloper for doing something he probably doesn't know he did.

Now he has a ginormous scholarship to the same college where I met my beloved in 1980.  He's pretty happy about going to Mercer University - they have a Chick-fil-A in the food court!  More than that, they have the engineering program to which he feels drawn.  I would tell you what it is, but I'm sure it has more letters than I know.  He has so much going for him, he made like 8 gazillion on his SAT.

More importantly, he loves Jesus!  His heart has been in a continuous molding process in the Master's hands. Its funny that sometimes our purpose is clear, and we strive everyday to get to it and give it our all.  And sometimes our purpose doesn't really show up for many years.  There has already been a great purpose for Andrew's life.  And now he's been given another one.  I pray he depends on God to show him what it is.  He'll do it with all his heart.  This I know.

So here I go, creating memories for my little one, for me, for us, for our family.  Flying on an airplane to the biggest family event we've had in a long time. Granny and Pawpaw might not be sitting in the seats with us watching, but the pride they feel in their grandson will undoubtedly be somehow present.